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I’ve found some women get frustrated with the ‘I have the kids this weekend’ scenario because it can dampen their spontaneity and they lose that one-on-one time that’s so important when dating, but it also might mean that the following weekend is a ‘child-free’ weekend.” “So many women (and some men) think they know their boundaries and yet accept unreasonable demands when they think they meet ‘the one,'” Zuckerman explains.

“The man you are dating may have children he is supporting,” Katz points out.

I recommend that women form a ‘committee’ of trusted advisers to help them to navigate all of the difficulties of the process of finding another mate,” Drenner says.

“These committee members can help identify areas of concern and help to prevent mistakes.” In other words, go ahead and ask your friends and family what they think of your new potential partners, and encourage them to be honest.

“Women over 40 sometimes convince themselves that there are not many good opportunities for a future mate on the dating scene after 40, and therefore settle for the first good candidate who comes along,” Drenner says.

“Too often, they make the ‘smart choice,’ meaning a good potential partner that cares for them, rather than the ‘heart choice,’ who is someone they love.” So go ahead and hold out for someone who you really, truly love.

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